Going to Sundance

Well, my ability to post nightly didn't last long, but hey, when you've got nothing to say, seriously, don't say anything at all. Life is moving at a speed that I'm having a very difficult time keeping up with. Between working more than 12-hours a day last week due to three big video projects, and starting pre-production on three music videos that are due sooner-than-later, I haven't even had time to clean my bathroom. I'm not complaining, I'm just stating that I'm balls-to-the-wall busy. I guess every time I wished upon that star and said, "I want to be a filmmaker," I didn't take into account how and when that would all happen. Because it's happening right now.

Tomorrow morning, I leave for Park City, Utah, to join the Idaho Reception at Park City on opening night of Sundance 2018. Clips from my film The Unlost will be showing along with other films that were shot and created in Idaho. The event is put-on to promote Idaho and all that it has to offer for filmmaking opportunities - location, talent, location, talent, (cheap locations)... you get the idea. My film has it all: incredible talent and a location to die for. I am thrilled beyond belief and honored to have been chosen for this event, which is in it's second year.

I'm going to Sundance.

Clips from my film will be shown.

I will be there promoting Idaho, my film, and myself as a filmmaker.

Shit can happen. Fun will be had.

Although it's always been a dream, I had never imagined that I would even get this close.

The Unlost doesn't stop here, I am in the process of submitting it to multiple film festivals around the world. It is a film that needs to be shared. Until then, and with only one night in Park City, I'll continue on my path of creating videos for a large corporation by day, and short films and music videos for friends by nights and weekends. Life is moving. Film is being created. I am blessed.

Before I left work today, I stopped by my studio to tear-down after today's shoot and prepare it for an upcoming shoot next week. Being in my studio is my quiet time. It is my peace. I meditate as I set-up for a shoot, without realizing that meditation is what's happening. The same thing happens when I tear-down a shoot. My happiness abounds in my studio, which I have nurtured and built for three years (anniversary date: January 12th).

In thinking about tomorrow and my trip to Sundance, tonight as I locked up I said goodbye to my HP studio as I know it today and hello to a future of possibilities.

Projects Galore!

Not much happened today, yet so much happened that I'm kind of shaking my head in wonderment at how I'm going to accomplish everything at work and with my independent film projects. I can do it, I mean hell, I just completed 32 months of full-time work/full-time school. It's not impossible, it's just a lot. I'll take my breaks when they're handed to me. Or, when I can create them myself. Speaking of, I'm going to bed. Late again tonight, for a 5am wake-up, but hey, I'm used to this. ;-) Plus, early morning wake-ups mean time for yoga. And that's my new thing now. And I'm loving it.

Day 3

I'm doing it tonight, because I said I would. I actually have a lot to write about, but I find myself at 10:30 at night needing to get ready for bed. Last night's five hours was not enough to survive. Well, I actually did alright on five hours of sleep, but it's not fair to get back into that habit so quickly. While I was in school, I was pulling 4-5 hours of sleep a night. I managed to make it through, but I was exhausted every day. There were a lot of afternoons where I would fall asleep at my desk. I don't think my eyes shut for more than a couple minutes, but it's never good to attempt to function in that manner. It's not fair to you and it's not fair to your job. So, I'll keep tonight's post short.

I talked to an ex-pro football player at the gym tonight for over a half hour. He had a lot of wisdom to pass on regarding fitness, nutrition, and life. A lot of what he talked about was in regards to football and training and training and training, which can be translated to what it takes to be a filmmaker. Practice, practice, practice. Every film we create, every opportunity we have to participate in a film project in some capacity is more practice for our art. Even if we don't feel strongly about the project, or just plain want a weekend free, if you committed to that film project, do it, with all your heart. At the same time, don't overcommit yourself. If you want a weekend to yourself, book that calendar for YOU! I need to remember to do this, my weekends are booking up fast.

Another thing he mentioned in regards to working out is quality over quantity. This is in reference to doing reps, like lifting weights. Don't speed through your weight lifting in order to do more reps, but lift with a slow and intentional purpose. The more intentional your lift, the more muscle you'll build. Again, this can be said for filmmaking. Don't rush through a film project just so you can say you shot something this month. Or because you feel left out because everyone else is making a movie and therefore I have to make mine!!! Make a quality film! Not more! Understand that pre-production takes more than just considering where in your living room you're going to shoot your scene. Production takes more than just showing up with a camera. Post-production takes more than just slapping a few clips together. Of course, there is a time and place for those productions and if done right, can be one hell of a film. There are 48-hour film contests that force a group of filmmakers to create a film in 48 hours, or less. These are valuable experiences, and I must say, some of the films that I've seen created for our local 48-hour film festival are crazy-good. These experiences, in fact, have helped me with productions at work. More often than not, I receive a request to create a video in less than a week, while also creating other videos, answering emails, attending meetings, and doing any other number of things that must be done in a 40-hour work-week. It's insane, but I do my best work. I give as much quality as I can, while delivering quantity. But in my personal films? Quality over quantity - always.

And that's more than I expected to write tonight. 11 minutes and this is what I wrote! Let's see if I can get in bed by 11pm tonight, so I can grab 6 hours of sleep!

Still Going Strong!

Made it to my second day of blogging! And that's about all I have to say about that.

Tonight is my first night without homework in nearly three years and guess what I've been doing since I got home? Sitting at my computer. I'm working through my director's cut of my thesis film, The Unlost, so have been sending messages to various people who still have a hand in post-production. I've also actually answered personal emails, which is something I completely neglected for the last 32 months. I'd answer anything important, but most of the time, I would mark my emails as unread and hope that I got to them in a decent amount of time. It's weird that I don't have any homework to do, yet I still find myself "working" on my various film projects after working all day at my day job on those film projects. Okay, continuing to work on films after I get home is not weird, that's just what I do, but still... I guess I have a difficult time sitting idle.

I bought a few books to keep me busy and help me realign with myself. I want to practice mindfulness and experience peace in all aspects of my life. I want to be the best version of myself that I can be. And while I was still ME while I was in school, I wasn't the best me. Life was rough. I would work, a lot, then come home and immediately sit at my computer to start my schoolwork. Weekends were riddled with homework and film projects and I got to a point where I was a big bucket of stress and nothing could stop the train that I was on. Perhaps that's why I'm having such a difficult time coming down from all of it. I'm not just a talker, I'm a doer. If I say I'm going to do something, I go out there and I do it to the best of my ability. So, I'm constantly doing. And I'm okay with that. We'll see how well I keep doing this blog - I still have my doubts. 

Speaking of practicing mindfulness and making me the best version of myself that I can be, I'm going to step away from this computer and start a yoga regimen from one of the books I bought last week. My goal is to be able to stretch again, feel good about myself, experience peace, AND lose those extra pounds I gained by the time I need to wear my nice pants again. So I don't have to buy new ones. I have about a month-and-a-half. OMG! I can do this.

New Year, New Blog

Well, here it is: The first day of 2018 and the first day that I *attempt* to blog *almost* every day for the entire year. Why? Because I feel like it. I think this will be good for me and I missed out on blogging about the last three incredibly difficult yet fulfilling years of my life. In 2014, I produced a feature film (still in post-production (more on that later, I'm sure)) and started creating videos for HP as a contractor. In 2015, I was offered a full-time position with HP (same as my contracting job, only now I'm official!), got a divorce, started attending Full Sail University, and dated a wonderful man. In 2016, I continued with school, broke up with that wonderful man, "dated," decided I didn't want to date AT.ALL, my grandfather passed away, and I found out that my neighbor was dealing meth out of his house. In 2017, my neighbor's house caught fire (the entire neighborhood is pretty sure that it was set intentionally), dealt with swat teams running through my yard, got back together with that wonderful man, traveled to Prague for business, the man moved in, I continued with school, shot my thesis film, and graduated from Full Sail University in December with a Bachelor of Science degree in Digital Cinematography. GPA: 3.9. That entire time that I was in school? I worked my share of full-time job.

And here I am, now in 2018. School is over, I still work full-time for HP creating customer-facing and internal videos, my thesis film is in post-production with the director's cut, and I'm in pre-production on several short films for various friends. Today is my last day of an 11-day "vacation" from work (including weekends) and it was not nearly enough to wrap my head around the fact that I now have a bachelor's degree. Something I've been wanting since high school, but it was always out of my grasp due to life and that beautiful thing called "perfect timing," which doesn't exist, by the way. People keep asking me, "what are you going to do now?" Like, everyone I talk to. That's the question and honestly, I don't have the answers that anyone is expecting from me. No one in Hollywood offered me a job right out of college; I'm not moving to California, not this year as far as I can tell; and I'm still working full-time and have no plans of leaving a steady job with benefits. I own my own house, I have a sensitive dog that goes to day camp three times a week, and I have three really annoying cats that still need my complete support. There is an incredible independent film community in Boise, and right now, I owe a lot of people some short films for all the work they did for me on my thesis film. So what am I going to do now? Make movies for my friends, keep working, and attempt to sell this house despite the mess next door.

That's my life in a nutshell! I worked on my New Years resolutions, but I'm going to ruminate on those for the next few days to make sure that I've covered everything. I went to the gym today to start losing all the weight I gained from stress eating and drinking while going to school and I made my yearly-supply of veggie broth, something I haven't made since I started school. I'd say this year is off to a pleasant start, full of thoughts and silent moments in my head; wondering what's next?